What can you as a parent do for your children?
Please take the time to follow some simple steps below to help
safeguard their Internet experience.
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Place your computer in the family room or another
open area of your home. Or use the computer together at a library,
school, or community center.
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Establish clear ground rules for Internet use
for your kids. Decide whether or not to use parental control
tools or protective software.
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Take the time to see what your kids are doing
online and what their interests are.
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Teach kids never to give out their personal
information to people they meet online especially in public
places like chat rooms and bulletin boards.
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Tell your child not to respond when they receive
offensive or dangerous email, chat, or other communications.
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Instruct your child never to plan a face-to-face
meeting alone with online acquaintances.
What Are the Risks?
There are a few risks for children who use the Internet or online
services. Teenagers are particularly at risk because they often
use the computer unsupervised and because they are more likely than
younger children to participate in online discussions regarding
companionship, relationships, or sexual activity. If you have a
teen in your family or you are a teenager, check out Teen Safety
on the Information Highway at /www.MissingKids.com or order a free copy by calling 1-800-843-5678.
"Teenagers are particularly at risk because... they are
more likely... to participate in online discussions regarding companionship..."
Exposure to Inappropriate Material
One risk is that a child may be exposed to inappropriate material
that is sexual, hateful, or violent in nature, or encourages activities
that are dangerous or illegal.
Physical Molestation
Another risk is that, while online, a child might provide information
or arrange an encounter that could risk his or her safety or the
safety of other family members. In a few cases, pedophiles have
used E-mail, bulletin boards, and chat areas to gain a child’s
confidence and then arrange s face-to-face meeting.
Harassment
A third risk is that a child might encounter E-mail or chat/bulletin
board messages that are harassing, demeaning, or belligerent.
Legal and Financial
There is also the risk that a child could do something that has
negative legal or financial consequences such as giving out a parent’s
credit card number or doing something that violates another person’s
rights. Legal issues aside, children should be taught good "netiquette"
which means to avoid being rude, mean, or inconsiderate.
How Parents Can Reduce the Risks
While children need a certain amount of privacy, they also need
parental involvement and supervision in their daily lives. The same
general parenting skills that apply to the "real world"
also apply while online. If you have cause for concern about your
children’s online activities, talk to them. Also seek out
the advice and counsel of teachers, librarians, and other Internet
and online service users in your area.
Open communication with your children, utilization of such computer
resources, and getting online yourself will help you obtain the
full benefits of these systems and alert you to any potential problem
that may occur with their use.
If your child tells you about an upsetting person or thing encountered
while online, don’t blame your child but help him or her avoid
problems in the future. Remember — how you respond will determine
whether they confide in you the next time they encounter a problem
and how they learn to deal with problems on their own.
"While children need a certain amount of privacy, they
also need parental involvement."
Beyond these basics, there are some specific things that you should
know about the Internet. For instance, did you know that there are
web sites and newsgroups that have material that is hateful, is
violent, or contains other types of material that parents might
consider to be inappropriate for their children? It’s possible
for children to stumble across this type of material when doing
a search using one of the web sites that is specifically designed
to help people find information on the Internet. Most of these sites
(called "search engines") do not, by default, filter out
material that might be inappropriate for children, but some offer
a child-safe option and some are designed specifically for use by
children.
Also the Internet contains web sites, newsgroups, and other areas
designed specifically for adults who wish to post, view, or read
sexually explicit material including stories, pictures, and videos.
Some of this material is posted on web sites where there is an attempt
to verify the user’s age and/or a requirement for users to
enter a credit card number on the presumption that children do not
have access to credit card numbers. Other areas on the Internet
make no such effort to control access. Nevertheless, consider monitoring
your credit card bills for such charges.
Some online services and ISPs allow parents to limit their children’s
access to certain services and features such as adult-oriented web
sites and "chat" rooms and bulletin boards. There may
be an area set aside just for kids where you don’t have to
worry about them stumbling onto inappropriate material or getting
into an unsupervised chat.
At the very least, keep track of any files your children download
to the computer, consider sharing an E-mail account with your children
to oversee their mail, and consider joining your children when they
are in private chat areas.
"The best way to assure that your children are having
positive online experiences is to stay in touch with what they are
doing."
In addition, there are filtering features built into the popular
Internet browsers (the software you use to access or telephone number.
You can find a directory of these filtering programs at www.safekids.com/filters.htm.
While technological child-protection tools are worth exploring,
they’re not a panacea. Regardless of whether you choose to
use a filtering program or an Internet rating system, the best way
to assure that your children are having positive online experiences
is to stay in touch with what they are doing. One way to do this
is to spend time with your children while they’re online.
Have them show you what they do, and ask them to teach you how to
use the Internet or online service. You might be surprised at how
much you can learn from your kids.
Guidelines for Parents
By taking responsibility for your children’s online computer
use, parents can greatly minimize any potential risks of being online.
Make it a family rule to:
- Never give out identifying information — home address,
school name, or telephone number — in a public message such
as chat or bulletin boards (newsgroup), and be sure you’re
dealing with someone that both you - and your child know and trust
before giving out this information via Email. Think carefully
before revealing any personal information such as age, marital
status, or financial information. Do not post photographs of your
children on web sites or newsgroups that are available to the
public. Consider using a pseudonym, avoid listing your child’s
name and E-mail address in any public directories and profiles,
and find out about your ISP’s privacy policies and exercise
your options for how your personal information may be used.
- Get to know the Internet and any services your child uses.
If you don’t know how to log on, get your child to show
you. Have your child show you what he or she does online, and
become familiar with all the things that you can do online.
- Never allow a child to arrange a face-to-face meeting with
another computer user without parental permission. If a meeting
is arranged, make the first one in a public place, and be sure
to accompany your child. "If a meeting is arranged, make
the first one in a public place, and be sure to accompany your
child." Never respond to messages or bulletin board items
that are suggestive, obscene, belligerent, threatening, or make
you feel uncomfortable. Encourage your children to tell you if
they encounter such messages. If you or your child receives a
message that is harassing, of a sexual nature, or threatening,
forward a copy of the message to your ISP, and ask for their assistance.
Instruct your child not to click on any links that are contained
in E-mail from persons they don’t know. Such links could
lead to sexually explicit or otherwise inappropriate web sites.
- If someone sends you or your children messages or images that
are obscene, lewd, filthy, or indecent with the intent to harass,
abuse, annoy, or threaten, or if you become aware of the transmission,
use, or viewing of child pornography while online, immediately
report this to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children’s
Cyber Tip line at 1-800-843-5678 or www.missingkids.com/cybertip.
Remember that people online may not be who they seem. Because
you can’t see or even hear the person it would be easy for
someone to misrepresent him- or herself. Thus, someone indicating
that "she" is a "12-year-old girl" could in
reality be a 40-year-old man.
- Remember that everything you read online may not be true. Any
offer that’s "too good to be true" probably is.
Be very careful about any offers that involve you coming to a
meeting, having someone visit your house, or sending money or
credit card information.
- Set reasonable rules and guidelines for computer use by your
children. Discuss these rules and post them near the computer
as a reminder. Remember to monitor your children’s compliance
with these rules, especially when it comes to the amount of time
your children spend on the computer. A child’s excessive
use of online services or the Internet, especially late at night,
may be a clue that there is a potential problem. Remember that
personal computers and online services should not be used as electronic
babysitters.
- Be sure to make this a family activity. Consider keeping the
computer in a family room rather than the child’s bedroom.
Get to know their "online friends" just as you get to
know all of their other friends.
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